I have an admission to make: I have more podcasts than I can reasonably keep up with. And, that was compounded a couple months ago when an editor turned me on to Wiretap, the Jonathan Goldstein podcast from the CBC. I’ve known Goldstein’s work from “This American Life”, and really enjoyed it. So, it’s no surprise that I’m a regular listener, although a delayed one.
Having just listened to the episode called “Envy” (a re-run, apparently), I was struck by the podcast’s revisit of the Cain and Abel story from Genesis. But I take a bit of issue with settling on envy as the core issue in the story. To me, it's never been a story about envy, but about attitude.
Check it. Here it is, as told in “The Message” translation from Chapter 4 of Genesis:
Adam slept with Eve his wife. She conceived and had Cain. She said, “I’ve gotten a man, with GOD’s help!”
2 Then she had another baby, Abel. Abel was a herdsman and Cain a farmer.
3-5 Time passed. Cain brought an offering to GOD from the produce of his farm. Abel also brought an offering, but from the firstborn animals of his herd, choice cuts of meat. GOD liked Abel and his offering, but Cain and his offering didn’t get his approval. Cain lost his temper and went into a sulk.
6-7 GOD spoke to Cain: “Why this tantrum? Why the sulking? If you do well, won’t you be accepted? And if you don’t do well, sin is lying in wait for you, ready to pounce; it’s out to get you, you’ve got to master it.”
8 Cain had words with his brother. They were out in the field; Cain came at Abel his brother and killed him.
9 GOD said to Cain, “Where is Abel your brother?”
He said, “How should I know? Am I his babysitter?”
The rest of the interchange is God telling Cain to hit the sticks, as punishment.
Notice, God takes immediate issue with Cain over his attitude, which he warns him to get in check before it balloons into something worse. Cain commits after he’s been warned.
So, let’s get this straight. The first 2 lessons for humanity in the Bible can be summed up as:
1. Follow the rules, or else (Adam & Eve)
2. Watch your attitude, or else (Cain & Abel)
Couldn't these rules also apply to every office / work situation you’ve ever encountered?
When you join an organization, you get a decent amount of education into the office’s rules / code of conduct / cultural norms. But, attitude is the one thing you bring with you, and one of the first things you’ll get judged on – fairly or otherwise.
I say “fairly or otherwise” because humans are human… Sometimes we read other people correctly, but often, we don’t. And I think it’s right for all of us to remember that the next time we’re prepared to rush to judgment. I mean, after all, if God can give Cain a chance to straighten up, surely you can cut the people around you a bit of slack, too.
I'll go one step further for managers...
I think it's a good idea to ask yourself if you might be fueling a team member's attitude problem without realizing it. Chances are you've seen managers cop bad attitudes of their own, and, subsequently, poison the attitudes of their teams. (Remember: If attitudes are infectious, then a manager's attitude can quickly become an epidemic.) Employees have a choice to govern their own attitude, sure. But we all know that people reflect the behavior of the people they answer to. Xenophon wrote, "As the leaders are, so shall the men be." I'm butchering the proper wording of the quote, sure, but you get the idea.
Or, there's another possibility you may not want to face: Could you be antagonizing someone into the wrong attitude? After all, attitudes are two-way streets. Managers can forget that good opinions and trust and mutual respect need to flow both ways in an office environment. You can't be effective without them, and neither can your team. If you come off as not showing any of those attributes to your team, or individual contributors, then attitude troubles shouldn't surprise you when they surface. Is there someone on your team you don't trust? Are you threatened by a direct report? Do you have unresolved issues with an employee? If you answer yes to these questions, and they're exhibiting a bad attitude, maybe you BOTH need a talking to.
Whatever the case, remember: Follow the rules and be conscious of how your attitude is perceived.
Now, if you want to understand envy better - and enjoy a fun, closing twist - I think Todd Snider’s “In the Beginning” is a pretty solid vehicle…
